Written at 01/01/26 at 00:06
I finally made it to the new year.
I celebrated it with my parents then returned to my room.
I can't wait to start establishing better habits for myself and becoming a more disiplined system.
I have no more time for games and nonsense from bad people, but to be fair, it wasn't my fault that I couldn't distinguish from good or bad faith until fairly recently nowadays. Identifying as a system has really solved a lot of problems with me and I can see everything (Such as my life up until now) more clearly and I'm sincerely grateful. I guess I am thankful for my ex, even though he took away our person and blocked us when he heard about our diagnosis.
I hope I may be happy and accomplished, but I also need to remember to be patient with myself, and identifying as a system helps heaps with this.
Thank you for reading.
Written on 12/31/25 at 3:35am
Hi there. This is Cassie-chan, writing!
I currently feel a little drowsy. I wish that we could all have good dreams. Even though I'm the main host of the Kyandi system, I don't know if I'm qualified enough to be considered a caregiver like Kotonoha or Himari.
I think by the end of 2026, I can achieve that and beyond for sure. It might be a bit too much pressure on me to try and make that a "goal" though.
I think trying to identify as a singlet was really dangerous and tiresome for me. I could barely perceive myself, and even though I was functioning, I was functioning on a lot of unstable software and OS (Operating System) 😵💫.
I had enough of forcing myself to identify as a singlet just so people who don't even want to stay in our lives for more than arguably a week could understand us. Being a system helps me understanding everything more easier, like everything is more organized. You don't have to change any part of your identity to please anyone, because what is, just is.
I also feel like, from my time of trying to be one person, people get to learn everything about me (Traumas, diagnoses, interests, etc.) more quicker compared to when I acknowledge myself as individual parts. I think identifying as a system can protect me too.